Wake Up! Waukesha

"The end of chemo...and a new phase"

Jay Walt — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 16:30:36 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is the 9'th blog on my journey)

First - My apologies. When I pledged to writing this, my commitment was to keep it fairly current without resorting to dragging out the smallest details. It's now about been about 2 1/2 weeks, but that leads me to the newest phase of my experiences - "It's pretty well become all about me."

Chemo was completed, and a week later the 35 radiation sessions were finally finalized on November 14'th. And during this time is where my thoughts, feelings, and state of well-being were taken over by a new physicality of the healing process. This has been an intense period where I awoke and dreaded whatever and however many pains that day would bring. While my brain was telling me "Good job Jay! You finished the chemo and radiation! Healing's on the way!", my body was on a completely different page of a new and strange book. A real "page-turner", every chapter twists, turns, and contorts you emotionally and physically.

Based on our typical, built up over the years medical experiences, I expect that when we get ill or injured, we follow a prescribed treatment for a certain length of time and... we get better. Throw this conventional thought process out when dealing with cancer! I really, honestly felt the fight rage within me between my past healing experiences and this newest "treatment's done - now you are really going to experience things". Only in the last day or two have I been able to step away from this conflict and assess and recognize that all of my focus has been on me. While the searing intensity of the past few weeks makes it easy for me to readily accept this, I am now surprised at how everything "non-me" has been blocked out. It also brings back that the medical professionals did provide some warnings about the lingering chemo and radiation effects, but there is no way they could have put a factor on them because "Everyone handles it differently".

By now you have figured out that my post chemo and radiation time has not gone quite as expected. You would be correct. Everything is still on track towards healing and a cure. However, it would be difficult to quantify the levels of discomfort when compounded with the perceived angst of not healing when you think you should be.

This most recent, negative phase has thrown everyone here a curve. Many comments during the prior treatment process were directed at how well I appeared to handle whatever was directed to me, and how strong I was in my fight against cancer. And we all therefore believed that this would continue throughout. In fact, I expected that from me. It truly was nice to hear compliments, and that motivated me in the same positive direction.

Therefore, it is important that I take pause and remember the "why's" of my treatment. This is also the time to review, respect, and thank the countless people who have said or are saying prayers in support of my full recovery. It's also important for me to put the past few weeks in perspective (and hopefully leave them there). But most importantly, I need to reestablish a positive approach in my fight against cancer. I just visited "the dark side" for a couple weeks...and I am not the better for it.

Almost everyone concurs on one point - a positive approach is the most important aspect in fighting cancer. The last phase (post chemo/radiation) pulled me away from that mindset - albeit for a short while.

Again moving forward, I have etched out the differences felt when challenging this miserable, miscreant disease from a positive perspective. One cannot put up a weak or neutral posture in this fight - cancer preys upon this.

Lessons learned...

"Mid-Term review ..."

Jay Walt — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 02:31:30 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is the 8'th blog on my journey)

Week 4 brought me the very welcome news that my tumor was shrinking. The relief - immediate! And Colleen and I now had something to build on looking forward. And ... I freely admit it - I immediately did countdowns on just about everything related to the illness and cure. How many more chemo IV sessions; how many radiation treatments; how many days for this/weeks for that... How many more plastic bottles of fine, vintage Boost/Ensure to accompany my main courses of pudding or chicken broth??

But, out of nowhere - an unexpected swerve in my thinking process. The rationalization of; treatment of; and living with cancer precludes giving a lot of thought to anything else. I recognized the need to re-indoctrinate back with family, friends, and co-workers.

**My co-workers at Automatic Entrances of Wisconsin have been supportive to the max. They understood where it is appropriate to bring my health challenge into their conversations with customers, and the context to use it. The open, forthright approach on my part has made it easier for them to address and move past my cancer in their jobs...

**Friends now breeze past the initial awkwardness of the "first" cancer conversation. As soon as you add "The tumor is shrinking", the conversational tone lightens up and optimism dominates your talk.

**The "Kids" understand and appreciate the concrete statement - "The tumor is shrinking". Their mindsets, rightfully so, tell them "Tumor gone - Cancer gone".

**Sister, brother, mother, in-laws, cousins and more all explore the myriad of following questions generated by this phrase. And these are pleasant, welcomed conversations.

**Colleen now goes into the fully-protective mode. Her relief at the good news is self-evident, but her RN experience dictates that every rule is to followed - to the end. No cheating on menu; prescriptions are maintained; rest; every treatment appointment will be kept, etc.. And suddenly the Christmas Menu is wide-open for discussion (Does Boost come in a Turkey or ham flavor?).

...And she quietly looks to me for a small acknowledgement of what she has experienced emotionally and physically over the past few months...

Thank you - Colleen!

Me? ...Truth is - the experts tell you chemo and radiation effects will compound as treatment times run on. And I would offer - the experts are correct on this as well. I am fortunate to have a pat answer to use in a conversation when asked "Hey Jay - How are you feeling?"

While good "luck" seems to be avoiding me recently, it's great to be able to answer - "Better - The tumor is shrinking."

Next: "The end of chemo therapy!"

"A positive attitude in the fight aganst cancer..."

Jay Walt — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 00:02:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is the 7'th blog on my journey)

READER - NOTE OF CAUTION: Do not stop reading this blog part way !

Week 3 in the treatment of cancer, and I sense things are different... Maybe it's my saliva glands shutting down and my new need for a "best friend" water bottle. Or could it be taste buds so compromised that fruit cocktail (remember fruit cocktail with its' gooey, sweet syrup and small little chunk of a cherry?) now tastes like biting a tin cup? I also astutely noticed occasional uncontrolled bouts of perspiration (Yes - Resembling what they call "Hot Flashes"...) and more.

The combined effects of chemo and radiation are now with you 24/7. They each generate noticeable side effects, but assuredly these side effects are willingly sustained in the cancer battle. And, as the entire medical community will tell you: "Everyone reacts differently". Well... consider my good fortune when I recount how I sustained/undertook/was subjected to/experienced/and felt each and every side effect which the medical community stated could occur - but everyone reacts differently...

That's right - Mouth and tongue sores, fatigue, drop in energy, loss of appetite, raw throat with pain accompanying swallowing, skin sores from radiation burns and chemo reactions, fevers, itchy rashes which look like a cross between acne and chicken pox, a now all-liquid diet, special soaps, special mouth rinses (several), an open account with Walgreens, lack of sleep, lack of concentration, headaches, special skin care creams, special toothpaste, gallons of "great-tasting" Boost and Ensure to provide basic nutritional supplements, and ...

How about a skin patch for pain as well as intense little pills which - SURPRISE! - create their own need for 4-8 additional laxative pills a day.

But remember - This is what could occur. Right.... And now fatigue, pain, and uncomfortableness are dragging your body and morale downwards.

And than... A moment of illumination! A defining turning point! An almost "out of body" conversation...

Dr. Wang, the radiation oncologist, in week 4, turns to look at Colleen and myself and says "...When we compare the CAT scan from your first visit to today's, it is apparent that the tumor is significantly smaller. Here - look for yourselves..."

I saw my wife's eyes tear-up as she beamed a radiant smile. My immediate first thoughts were the relief and comfort this would give to her, our families, and concerned friends. My next thoughts - nano seconds behind the first - were directed to that electronic image of the now-smaller tumor on the screen. In approximate order:

"Thanks to all - The prayers, treatments, and positive thoughts are working"

"This fight is not over until I say it's over... And it's not over until we have won and this cancer loses!"

"Only a few weeks to go - I can handle whatever the treatment demands"

NEXT: "It's not over yet..."

"Don't let the first two weeks fool you..."

Jay Walt — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 00:08:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is the 6'th blog on my journey)

"First thing we will schedule will be the mask-fitting and..."

What's this about a mask-fitting? Well, as I have recently learned, you are positioned "just-so" during radiation treatments to ensure absolute accuracy. To accomplish this, a personalized, whole-head mask is used. You, the patient, are aligned in a treatment position while the plastic is heated and than fitted. They then bring you over to their side by whispering "This is your special mask, and it will only be used by you..." I have an exclusive, personalized mask reserved for only my use - Excellent! Except...I looked in a mirror and now bear a striking resemblance to Hannibal Lecter. And what's with this sudden urge for fava beans?

Treatments were scheduled by Dr.Stuart Wong - the Chemo Oncologist, and Dr. Dian Wang - The Radiation Oncologist. There would be 7 chemo treatments (a great way to start every Monday for 7 weeks), and 35 radiation sessions (daily for 7 weeks). The chemo was started a week prior and it's role in my treatment is to make the cancer cells more susceptible to the radiation.

The chemo is roughly a 2 1/2 hr. IV drip in a quiet, relaxing environment. TV, beverages, great views, and a recliner all combine to make the time pass comfortably. Radiation is a little more intimidating...

The radiation treatment area is comprised of several enclaves with different equipment in many. My specific area, LinAcc 2, has a CAT scanner and a linear accelerator at opposing ends of a rotating bed-bench. My treatment team - Jean, Brian, and Kayla, are as precise as a Swiss watch. The patient lays down carefully positioned to duplicate the identical spot on the bench every time. And than "my" mask is brought to me. The mask is placed over your head and the frame on the back of it is clamped to the bench. The Team takes time to explain the need for exactness - they are aiming the radiation pattern to sub-millimeter dimensions to avoid unnecessary damage to the adjacent tissues. And, if you smile nicely (and bring in scrumptious cookies) they will provide you with a musical background to fit your moods.

My mask and I are inserted into the CAT scanner where images are taken daily for comparison and alignment. When complete - I am rotated 180 degrees directly under/within the LinAcc unit which then delivers the radiation. This process takes about 45-50 minutes and I consider myself fortunate to be under the watchful eye of my team. Brian (a known Cubs fan!), brings a wry irony which belies his age; Jean's humanism is sincere and comforting; and Kayla's quick smile and efficient work help transform an impersonal room into a caring area of healing.

Given the "unknown" of what I was facing, I admit to having had something between trepidation and cold, wet fear starting off. After two weeks, in an error of epic proportions, I felt compelled to boastfully announce to anyone who would listen that "I'm doing better than they expected..."

How absolutely ignorant, self-serving, and premature!

The doctors and staff gently (and I think I detected ...smugly?) suggested "Don't let the first two weeks fool you..."

Trust me - I now know that they know!

NEXT: "Progress in the fight..."

Let's finally get on with treatment of my cancer...

Jay Walt — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 02:33:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is 5'th blog on my journey)

Finally, the shock of cancer has settled in and I am in full-battle mode. It is time to quickly absorb what the experts are telling us and move forward with "The Cure". The sooner we start with treatment, the sooner my life and my family's life can resume normalcy. The good Dr. Campbell has told me I have the aforementioned, so let's move quickly and decisively.

Except....

"I need a PET Scan and a biopsy to confirm the type and location of the cancer?" What?! I've already accepted it's what Dr. Campbell said - now let's get going!

But that's not how it works. I really had accepted this cancer and found myself wanting to start the curative process (before the rules could change...).

And now the wait - when the doubts inside you build: "What if the cancer has spread? What if they find it's a completely different cancer? What if this now unidentified cancer is not curable???" And yet you remain strong to your family while honestly worrying deep inside on how a change in news could impact their lives...

"Mr. Walt - Good news - the cancer is exactly what we suspected and where we thought it would be."

This perverted disease twists and turns you and your family inside out - emotionally and physically.

The best underlying message to the above was we could now proceed with a preselected combined treatment of 7 chemo and 35 radiation sessions. Education from many sources at Froedtert also became important as nutritionists, "journey coordinators", counselors and more weighed-in.

And as Colleen and I made decisions, I internally experienced what could best be called a huge burst of optimism. I was being given treatment choices which, if followed, would provide a very good cure rate - and that means we win - and the cancer loses!

But as we were to learn shortly, cancer does not lose easily, nor does it relinquish it's tenacious grasp within your body readily.

NEXT: "Don't be fooled by how you feel the first two weeks..."

Unbelievable Support Received...

Jay Walt — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 01:25:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is 4'th blog on my journey)

The open approach of communication of my cancer began. Family, close friends, business associates, and more were called personally. The goal: to properly inform without a lot of room for conjecture or misinterpretation. And almost immediately the phone started ringing... Call upon call with questions; offers of support; expressed sympathy; similar health challenges; which presidential candidate do we support?; shared pain; and "How are the kids doing?"

Embarrassment at being the center of attention during the first calls turned to bewilderment that so many people took time out from their lives to express concern over ours. And it quickly snowballed - cards, emails, letters, everything short of YouTube. And all this while - Colleen and I were at Froedtert for tests, biopsies, doctor appointments, and a treatment plan and schedule developed. And did I mention I had a real job with real co-workers and a real workload?

And yet the support rolls in.... Somewhere "Up There" they are wondering who this "Walt Guy" suddenly is because they are working OT and straining under the volumes of prayers which have been, are being, and will be said on my behalf. I checked "Up There" to send thank you's and found the prayer bookeeping a little lax. I would have to pay a small fee via PayPal to get these records...sigh....

On the personal front, I am emotionally bouyed by the sheer numbers of families who have pledged positive thoughts to our family. Early on, one could sense these uplifting messages comforted both myself and, more importantly, my family. We shared with our kids. We downloaded and printed every supportive email. We read and re-read every card.

My wife asked me not to bring this up, but a group of our closest friends even threw a Cancer (Recovery) Party - in advance! In addition, my dentist, Dr. Dennis Abere, his wife, (one of the nicest couples - in the world!) and his staff sent cards, and special mouth and dental treatments to minimize the radiation and chemo effects.

I am literally blessed by this outpouring from our friends and this Waukesha Community. My cancer is, unfortunately,affecting the family right now. The support, prayers, and kind thoughts of many have had a huge impact on us.

Who could lose with this many determined supporters (can you tell it's election season?) willing a positive outcome?

NEXT: "Let's get on with it...."

Communicating the message of Cancer...

Jay Walt — Sat, 04 Oct 2008 16:08:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is 3'rd blog on my journey)

My three children ages 19, 21, and 23 needed to be informed that I had cancer, but they also needed to hear some balance including our plan of attack to work towards a high cure rate. As parents, we all know the universal challenge of "selective hearing" with our kids. Ask them face-to-face to do a chore, and you might get an acknowledging grunt. Whisper to your wife from 2 rooms away that you are thinking of a Mexico Vacation, and the kids will immediately yell which weeks work best for their schedule...

Our oldest was home, and the 2 younger are away at UW LaCrosse. How awful...how emotionally gut-wrenching to have to break news like this over a phone, but to wait would have only forestalled the inevitable. We arranged a speaker-phone conversation for Monday when Kelly, our oldest, would be back from a long weekend getaway. I rehearsed, rehearsed, and dreaded the call. I really had no "spin" - it would be "just the facts", with emphasis on the probability of a cure. This mental rehearsal also became the basis for how Colleen and I would communicate this to others moving forward. The only benefit to having to wait for Monday was that I was still grappling with my personal desire to let people know while allaying their concerns. The plan became obvious - Tell the full truth. My business sense took over - People just "know" when you believe what you are telling them, and they also can tell when a "snow-job" is being attempted.

We called - I spoke calmly - the kid's reactions were as varied as their personalities - and my heart sank. One "too" quiet and two softly crying. One angry and another in denial. And one became withdrawn from the conversation...My hopes for some meaningful discourse on the subject - gone! But was I really surprised? I'm their "Dad", and by their definition - I am to be strong, in-charge, invulnerable, and funny. Instead - they heard "Cancer...wounded and concerned". But over the next days and weeks they dealt with this taboo subject in their individualized ways. They needed to see Colleen and I were continuing normal living (OK - Add about a few dozen doctors appointments in there). ...And it was right there - they were absorbing subtle cues from us! Our positive "Let's get on with the "Cure" approach was rubbing off and paying dividends with the younger Walts. That is gratifying and the best news I could have received.

And the "These are the facts" approach to conveying the message of cancer continues with my friends, associates, family, and others. All I ask is:

"During our conversation you will hear the word Cancer - please... please also hear the words Treatment and Cure!"

NEXT: Unbelievable and unexpected support...

"Alone...With Cancer..."

Jay Walt — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 00:40:00 GMT

(Note: On September 5th, 2008, I was diagnosed with Squamous Cell Tongue Cancer - Stage 4. Following is 2nd blog on my journey)

My wife, Colleen, and I left the doctor's office very quietly - she with her thoughts, me with mine. While driving home, I worked to create a superficial conversation centered on the few "positives" I believed Dr. Campbell had given us:

"It can be cured; it would have been Stage 3 if the mass was slightly smaller; you are otherwise in good health; it will be a combo of radiation and chemo; Froedtert has an excellent team:..." were a few of the comments recalled. My wife - the nurse, was silent. It was obvious her experience in dealing with worse-case scenarios was dictating her thought processes right then. And the car went quiet as I respected her need to internally think her husband's cancer through. Switching to a classic rock station didn't seem quite appropriate about then. And I was now alone with my thoughts...

"How do I communicate this with others when I don't fully understand nor have I absorbed the news delivered an hour before? Where do I resource good internet information on this cancer? Who do I call and in what order? How do I package the message to minimize the obvious concern which will be directed to our family? How am I with cancer?....And What/when/and how does this message get conveyed to my 3 kids ages 19 - 23?"

During the next day, independent calls were made to several trusted friends with medical resources. First - Who is the preeminent doctor for this somewhat rare, 3% of the cancer population, cancer? Second - What should we additionally be asking and is Froedtert the place? Third - Does Froedtert have a machine with IMRT (Intensity modulated radiation therapy) radiation capabilities? The answers were unanimous: Get Dr. Bruce Campbell (He diagnosed the cancer!) - Froedtert is the place and we now had many questions ready for them - Froedtert has a brand new IMRT linear accelerator which maximizes radiation with pinpoint, sub-millimeter precision to minimize damage to surrounding tissue.

I had frank discourse with Colleen on my desire to aggressively take on whatever treatment options were available, and my reliance on her to understand and interpret the myriad of medical terms, phrasings, etc to come. (Somehow I didn't feel my construction-related job experiences were good prep courses for the nuances of Latin medical terminology) The different possibilities surrounding the "What, When, and How do I tell people ranging from family to friends to business associates to casual acquaintances of this challenge?" were winnowed to being open, honest, and factual without self pity (Too late - I already have the disease) nor emotion (Let's get on, now, to a "Cure"). The sooner this moving-forward message could be personally delivered in this fashion, the better the hope to reduce concern from others (Most people have issues/challenges of their own and really don't need another cause for worry).

And suddenly I honestly felt better! We were not being totally reactive to the news of Cancer - we were now doing something productive and positive! We were looking ahead instead of hand-wringing and indulging the "what-ifs" of the prior day. Our paths of informed decision-making and self-advocacy were being mapped out.

The disease cancer, and the treatment towards a cure for my tongue cancer might control our short-term schedule, but it was not going to rule my life!

NEXT: Delivering the message... and more tests

"Jay Walt - You have Tongue Cancer - Stage 4..."

Jay Walt — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 01:36:00 GMT

At 1:45 PM on Friday September 5th, 2008, my future changed.

Actually, my future had been altered sometime earlier this year. I noticed a small lump on the left side of my neck. Being 55, I have gotten used to the bumps, lumps, and irregularities which accompany the aging process. As Summer wound down, I visited my long-respected Dr. Dan Thompson for a routine physical...and a check of the now growing, disregarded bump. He ordered CT scans which showed "some mass - probably a cyst". Dr. Dan suggested Dr Bruce Campbell, a Director of Head and Neck Surgical Oncology at Froedtert Hospital.

Prior to our appointment at Froedtert, my wife Colleen - R.N., researched cysts. Working on this assumption, we were both dismayed to realize I was probably going to have a small scar just under my chin from the day surgery needed to remove the cyst. 2 days later we were at Froedtert for our quick in-and-out visit.

Dr. Campbell is the consummate professional. He was on time, thorough, and asked basic background. He did a routine mouth and throat exam, reviewed the CT screens and than brought out a laryngoscope to get a better view of my lower throat through my nose! This scope has a long "tendril-like" black hose with a bright lght and Hi-Def camera at the end. It films the journey downward (sound like a Disney reality ride?). Up the nose and down the throat it went with my wife and the good doctor watching the computer screen - I had my mouth open, eyes closed tightly, and breathed quite carefully.

I sensed a subtle difference in the room as the tube snaked down...down...down. And then...the tube was retracted and I relaxed. Dr. Campbell suggested we watch the film while he explained what we were looking at. Way back and way down, at the base of the tongue, there was a "sore" and a golf-ball sized (1 1/4" diameter) "mass" - the obvious cyst I would have removed. My wife started weeping quietly and, to lessen the obvious tension and now believing the cyst scar would be bigger than expected, I asked Dr. Campbell to switch the computer to ch 30, ESPN for the Brewers Game...

"Mr. Walt, you have a Squamous Cell, Stage 4, Tongue Cancer..." "There is a tumor on the base of your tongue and it has spread to the adjacent cervical nodes(hence - the 1 1/4" lump)"

That room got very hot almost instantaneously, and perspiration flowed freely from my forehead. "It can be treated with radiation and chemotherapy..." My comprehension skills were dimming when I realized how Colleen had to be feeling and how much I needed to support her right then and there. She had just left a challenging healthcare meeting concerning her father to join me at Froedtert...and now her husband has "Cancer - Stage 4!" That's more than most families should deal with in a decade, much less 2 hours apart. My "Head of the Family" instincts kicked-in and I asked about cure rates, types of and duration of treatments, could it be something-anything else?

It's amazing how one thinks in different planes during extreme moments of challenge. "How do I approach this with my kids, friends, co-workers, and business associates?" "How come I don't physically feel different with Cancer vs without?" "Why did this have to add to Colleen's concern for her Dad - and why now?" "Do I trust Dr. Campbell or do I need a second opinion?' "Now that I have Cancer, how quickly can we move forward with treatment?" These thoughts and hundreds more flew through my head while the doctor asked for additional in-depth medical history. My mind was racing..."I want to see my kids' weddings; I want to hold grandchildren; I want to be a part of my wife's life for years to come; I don't want people worrying about me; This was not supposed to happen now; I need to be an exemplary strong patient; Why am I not afraid?; I absolutely insist on maintaining a sense of humor; I don't want to be a burden to my family; my kids and Colleen will take their cues from me..." And the doctor's questions continued...

And on that day, and I don't know or question why, there is one thought which never entered my mind - "Why me?"

It can only be rationalized as how blessed I must be to have this many people who mean so much to me...

NEXT: Colleen and me - Alone...

Terry Sutter - A quiet presence

Jay Walt — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 02:43:00 GMT

Waukesha is a community of caring and giving. One would be hard-pressed to find a community equal to ours where the outpouring of generosity and volunteerism is omnipresent. Often, the same individuals and companies give...and give...and give.

My work on and with several area boards allows me to interact with many concerned, involved citizens. Many of these people serve on more than 1 board at a time. While some might be motivated by networking, most donate their time, ideas, and energies as a means of giving-back. Most never look for thanks or recognition.

In that vein - Is there someone/anyone who has volunteered more time on local boards than Terry Sutter? A transplant from Shorewood (Whitefish Bay?) sometime in the distant past, Terry has either met, dined with, helped bank, served with, volunteered at, or just generally been a part of so many groups and functions that I use him as my personal "White Pages" when contact is needed with someone.

Unquestionably his original involvement started with the intent of expanding his contacts for his chosen banking profession. Years passed and...something happened! He went from being a superficial "glad-hander" who viewed every new contact as another depositor/borrower to a diligent, knowledgeable Board member who just happened to be in banking. I honestly believe this transformation was almost a "Scrooge/Tiny Tim moment" as Terry sensed the satisfaction which comes from meaningful volunteerism.

And, unbeknownst to many, while Terry was giving back to others in need, his own family had pressing needs - his wife struggled for many years with Alzheimer's. Terry was her principal care-giver at home. Alzheimer's is incredibly mean-spirited: it takes away wonderful minds while leaving the physical shell as a grim reminder of it's "visit". There is no break - no magic pill - no cure. Just an inexorable march to an emotionally-draining finish. And the "journey" for family and friends can be solitary, gut-wrenching and exhaustive. During this time, Terry's devotion and service to his wife was unwavering...yet he found a balance in his life with his Community service.

So you ask - Why single Terry Sutter out when there are countless others also deserving of recognition?

Because he is the real deal and can serve as a model for others. Sure, he is still in banking, and yes, he might, at a volunteer function, still trip into some networking opportunity (and for these rare occasions, his partner Sandy handles details that Terry would probably miss...). Regardless - his experience and input are invaluable. And as years pass, I have come to respect and admire his dedication to Waukesha - his adopted homeland. His input is felt and respected at many levels.

In short - Don't be fooled by his almost curmudgeonly demeanour: it masks a quiet presence. A presence which is emblematic of the moral fabric of our Community.

New Waukesha "Landmark" ???

Jay Walt — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 02:13:52 GMT

Please tell me someone with tons of money is just playing mind games with me. Please!?

If you have not witnessed the birth of the new Menard's Store across from Target and Home Depot on Kossow and Hwy J, I suggest you hurry lest your neighbors "scoop" you on this one.

It is big... It is "G-normous"... In fact - it towers over the surrounding landscape! Rumors abound that this could be a 2-story spectacle of "Save big money at Menards..." I wouldn't be surprised. It dominates (good for the retailer hoping to attract attention - but is it really good for the local Community?).

First - The positives: Local jobs, increased tax base, competition (until Home Depot leaves), proximity for shoppers, better store than it's replacing, and... I really don't now after that. Sightseers? Gawkers? Tilt-up wall construction aficionados? Waukesha "stole" a development from one of the Brookfields? Albanese's will get more Bocce Ball contenders...

Second - The questions: Has anyone tried to navigate this area as it currently stands? Kossow and Hwy 18 is one of the most problematic intersections in Wisconsin. Now add another 25,000 cars a week! Was there any way to retain the store with it's positives while mediating the insatiable lust for the biggest retail store possible on this sight? Given the looming/towering shadow of this behemoth, did the Menard's developers show up at planning meetings with "Lawyers and everything?"

Two sides are available for discussion. The first is to take the position that the area is already a retail mess and one more store won't hurt or make a difference. The other side states "The area is already a retail mess and this will make a bad situation that much worse."

Myself? I am basically stunned by the sheer magnitude of this building for the size of the lot. It doesn't just sprawl - it is an incredibly tall structure for a retail building. (Don't be surprised to see red aviation warning lights on it's roof - It is on final for the East/West Waukesha runway). It almost defies belief and acceptance that this could actually occur in today's political climate of review and demands on developers.

The Opus Corp is developing Shoppes at Fox River. They are a first-rate developer. Let's hope the people entrusted with the Waukesha review process work cooperatively to provide a quality retail development without creating a concrete albatross for the next 30 years of our viewing pleasure. The bar for big-box development has been set incredibly low, and it needs to be raised.

"Landmark" Status for the Menard's monstrosity???

Hardly!

Today's Pain - Tomorrow's Gain?

Jay Walt — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:22:30 GMT

Gas at $4.15/gallon. Utility bills skyrocketing while they lobby for increases. Grocery bills which climb, noticeably, on a weekly basis. Flooding which impacted tens of thousands in SE Wisconsin and which will strain State budgets in the coming year(s). GM announces eventual closure of Janesville plant. "Upside-down" in one's mortgage is a phrase many now understand. Iraq. Midwest Airlines struggles in the fight of its' life to stay aloft. Lake Delton disappears in a couple hours. A continuing weather cycle which started early December and continues to plague us with storms of greater than normal intensity seemingly every 4-7 days. 401K plans never were designed for today's economic climate And now...Mosquitos!!

Where are the lessons to be learned from this? We don't and can't control many of the above. In fact, we can go to our backyards and scream in unison and futility over the myriad of challenges we now face - and no one will listen. Lives are being changed - most not for the better. Charities are feeling the pinch of re-directed funds and many programs for those in need will go underfunded. Where is any silver lining in this?

Unfortunately many of us will not come through the next few years unscathed. Retirements will be deferred. Many will put themselves at personal and financial risk by going without expensive health care coverage. Homes in default will be taken back by lenders. People - real people, will be impacted negatively. And following is the best I can come up with...

Today's younger generation, many of them, have not experienced having to accept "no" in their lives. As guilty as anyone, I have worked diligently to ensure my kids had comforts I never dreamed of as a child growing up. I, like many of my peers, felt proud to be able to get our children "the latest, greatest whatever", and we often went to extremes (remember the hunt for Cabbage Patch Babies, Tickle Me Elmo, Beanie Babies, X-Box, and many more?) to "prove our love" for them. Don't like your ACT score? No problem - Let me get you the Cd and the on line study guide and you can take it again and again until your score gets you into the "preferred" college.

This generation is feeling the pain right now. Many are just starting out and have precarious mortgage situations where they cannot pay more for incidentals. Many are trying to save for their first home, but savings are being compromised by fuel and utility expenses as well as increasing rents. Is it possible they will, like generations before them, get through? Of course! But will they learn from the challenges being flung their way? I can only hope so.

I am 55, and my first mortgage in the early '80's was at a fixed rate of 13%. And that was an FHA loan with insurance - a virtual steal back than if you could get it. As a result, I became very rate conscious and much more "home-savvy". Rates dropped and things worked out...and I was smarter for the experience.

Bad news is upon us daily like a plague. However, there are still many wonderful things in my life - Family, friends, and job. Despite the apparently never-ending saga of bad news on the outside, I choose to believe that "Today's Pain" will be "Tomorrow's Gain" - albeit for the next generation.

Let's hope I'm right and something good does indeed come out of this mess.

Could Mother Teresa qualify for Waukesha School Superintendent opening?

Jay Walt — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 03:02:00 GMT

No....Mother Teresa (were she still with us) would not qualify to be the new Waukesha School Superintendent. Nor would Gandhi, the Dalai Lama, and Albert Schweitzer would only make the first round of cuts.

Why would these otherwise kind, great humanitarians not qualify for the Superintendent's position? Because their efforts to promote kindness, compassion, wisdom, and vision were met with acceptance and appreciation. Given the current funding challenges facing the new District regime, any of the aforementioned traits will be discounted by some in the local Waukesha Community as being "not what's needed" right now.

The Waukesha School District continues to face budget cuts every year for a variety of reasons, but primarily because of an extremely flawed State funding formula. These cuts will erode the quality of this District (and many others in the State) unless an intervention occurs - and soon! I would love to believe Mother Teresa has a miracle awaiting us?(she doesn't) Could Gandhi promote Waukesha Community "accord" and togetherness instead of heavily polarized opinions? (no chance at all) Would the Dalai Lama expound philosophically with a subliminal message of hope for future students? (submarinable...submersible...subhumanal...never mind...) Would a Schweitzer "cure" for the State school funding debacle qualify him for a second Nobel Peace Prize? (sorry - someone would say he fixed the State formula just to make himself look good...)

If the above notables would fall short in many areas needed for this position, what kind of expectations should we hold for the next Waukesha Superintendent? Let's start with realism and a healthy dose of hope. Add to that a desire for an intelligent, compassionate, dedicated, and concerned approach. Finish with an incredibly thick skin because this Community has demonstrated a curious need to criticize at a level often approaching public humiliation, while never offering a hint of constructive criticism.

The next Superintendent of Schools truly has his or her her work cut out for them.

Maybe Al Gore (After all - he invented the Internet!) would be interested???

Rep. Scott Newcomer and a lesson in the "Red Herring" marketing technique...

Jay Walt — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 02:36:00 GMT

Recently State Rep. Scott Newcomer wrote a guest opinion in another publication which was titled: "Wisconsin’s school systems should teach money management." Scott used April, which is recognized as Financial Literacy Awareness Month, as the springboard highlighting the need to raise financial understanding through the school systems.

Well written, his column acknowledges the need for (and lack of) parental advice in these matters. It goes on to state "less than half of college students polled said their parents made a conscientious effort to teach them.I find it inconceivable that such a vital topic is left out of the school system and placed solely in the hands of the public. As parents, many of us often times find ourselves puzzled by the task of assisting in our children’s math or science homework. Despite this truth, the majority of college students cite parents as their primary source of information on money management, yet less than a quarter of them feel prepared for the financial challenges awaiting them. This illustrates the fact that additional education from schools is needed in order to improve the quality of the information flowing in the public sphere." "...I feel that each individual school district, if it is not already doing so, should strive to implement financial education requirements."

Please stop there! Yes! - Yes! - NO!

YES - Rep. Newcomer is correct that there is a need for better understanding of financial matters for our youth. Issues grow more complex daily and the financial challenges and machinations facing this generation are significant. Simply - there is much to learn and little done about it.

YES - Rep. Newcomer is correct in calling attention to the frustrating stats which reflect that only a minority of college students feel prepared for the oncoming financial challenges. The grim realities are that parents do not have a "warm and fuzzy" when working with their own children in these areas. The best teaching tools would be a family's own finances, but many parents truly do not want their offspring delving too deep into their checkbook, investments, credit card obligations, etc.. No further explanation is needed for most parents...

NO! - Rep. Newcomer is absolutely incorrect in his thoughts that each school district should strive to implement financial requirements! While I totally agree on the need for basic training in finances, I challenge Rep. Newcomer on where the responsibility lies. Every news publication in this State has weekly articles, stories, letters to the editor, and more which bring into laser-like focus the core issue - The State Education System is broke! The current funding formula demands cuts and improvisations to school budgets across the State! Waukesha has been particularly hard-hit for many years, and there are no "Bright Tomorrows" on the horizon here.

The breakdown between Scott and myself occurs because... These Districts cannot currently fund the State mandates for education! The very last thing on the agenda for most districts these days is adding curriculum at additional costs. Heck - I favor many areas where I believe education in the early years will pay dividends for our youth for years to come: Renewed second language emphasis; expanded tech-ed offerings (the building trades are worried about the coming years); basic home computer maintenance; career planning; current world politics; and the list goes on...

The chasm in thought processes between us is succinctly demonstrative of the issues we as constituents and voters face with many of our State representatives. Unfunded State mandates to school districts are a major contributing factor to many school budget dilemmas. Now we have, in a very deft pen-stroke, a local State Rep doing more of the same. His identification of the need is good: His avoidance of taking a leadership position at the State level to get it fixed is sad. And finally, his "challenge" to the Districts to implement these courses is a classic "Red Herring" technique of misdirection...

Truly, we deserve (and desperately need) better from our local elected officials in Madison. Maybe early "Financial Literacy" classes would have helped them...

Mayor Larry Nelson - Worthy of scorn or support?

Jay Walt — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 02:00:00 GMT

Today I read about Waukesha Mayor Larry Nelson delivering his version of a "State of the Union" address to the Common Council. Basically a recap of his first two years serving as Mayor, his presentation covered many of the positive developments which occurred during this time frame.

This occasion pushes the question: Should "Mayor Larry" be judged by his own assessment, or should public and media comments singlehandedly frame our opinions?

The Mayor has unquestionably been tremendous fodder for the local media. From his footwear choices, to travels which invariably conflict with some meetings, to unabashedly wearing his Democratic loyalties on his (short) shirt sleeves, Mayor Larry has certainly taken his share of criticisms from many corners. Ok...Maybe it wasn't politically expedient being photographed at an Obama rally with your new Administrator in tow - during normal working hours. Why - he even had the audacity to try to protect the budgets of several Waukesha municipal services from cuts in this era of "taxation hell!"

On the flip side - Go to most established community charity fund-raisers; The Mayor will usually be there lending support. Walk through Downtown during an Arts Crawl - Larry will be talking to anyone who will listen. Need to add "gravitas" in getting a new local event off the ground? Ask Mayor Nelson for his help and he will step to the plate whether speaking or just attending. When Waukesha needed decisive action on the critical "water" issue, Mayor Larry was in Madison lending his support, and then took a couple days of intense politically-driven media poundings for taking a stand... When the ugly realities of education funding rears its' (to some) ugly head, the Mayor will flat-out come forward and reiterate the value of a quality educational product within one's Community.

QUICK! How many cities were named as "One of the 2008 100 Best Communities for Young People in the United States" by America's Promise Alliance? For the second consecutive year? The answer: Only Waukesha in SE Wisconsin! And Waukesha Mayor Nelson was there proudly beating the drums to garner attention for the Community.

HERE'S ONE! Name the last higher-ranking public official who will return phone calls and emails, and then go on, albeit interminably at times, about the great things occurring in Waukesha - The (trick) answer? Both Mayor Nelson and his predecessor Mayor Carol Lombardi. Interestingly, he will even ask your opinion on local issues...

It's obvious Larry Nelson enjoys being Mayor. He also truly believes the role of mayor extends far beyond presiding over Common Council meetings. His unflagging support for all things "Waukesha" is demonstrated on a daily basis. Is the Mayor outspoken on many issues? YES!! Does he bring that same frank and earnest approach to the public table on behalf of Waukesha? YES!! Will he continue ruffling feathers? YES!! And will he maintain that unmistakable air of individuality during his tenure? YES!!

Mayor Larry Nelson will walk the path he believes in. With over 50,000 people in this Community, I am sure he will find someone who disagrees with almost every single thing he says or does. His persona will continue to draw attention to any gaffes - large or small. But his heart belongs to the City...and one must respect that.

I held reservations about "Larry as Mayor"... I still harbor suspicions about his "Crocs" footwear (or whatever those things are...). Waukesha is a fiercely proud, individualistic, political, diverse Community. Why would you want your mayor to be any different?

The Benefits of a "Record" Winter

Jay Walt — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 01:05:08 GMT

"It's not over till the fat lady sings..."

This winter past is a reminder that we do indeed live in Wisconsin. Several of the most recent winters often arrived late; brought out snowblowers only 2-4 times; and left early. Having had between 9' and 10' of snow, many of us are crying "Uncle".

Regardless of how I personally feel, there are many who have benefited from the white plague above. Start with the dedicated plow drivers who kept their equipment running and streets clear against long odds. Their well-earned OT preceded the wonderful tax season. And when they collect OT, the State is there ready to collect taxes on the extra income. And as long as we are in a tax-paying mood - peruse your gas pumps for how much more petrol was used plowing and how much we pay in gas taxes. The State thanks you, the plow drivers thank you, salt companies really thank you.

Auto body shops? Full for weeks to come. Car part vendors are having a banner year and...more wages with more State taxes. Small appliance repair shops fixed snowblowers and never gave much thought to lawn mowers. Windshield fluid companies had to invest in more blue dye because we all know spraying snowy and icy windshields is faster than a defroster. The company that makes the reflectors tarred onto our highways will be filling replacement orders for the ones who fell victim to constant plowing.

Other (unintended) profiteers? - Chiropractors with long lines of "shovel-backs" waiting to get in; replacement mailbox manufacturers; landscapers waiting to fix lawn-scarring from the municipal plows; TV weather-people who get more air-time than national or local news reporting; roofers contending with ice dams, and many more.

Me? I am screaming "Uncle"!! ...Enough!! Give me the dull grey-green of an emergent lawn. Let me switch garage places between snowblower and lawn mower.Allow us the pleasure of driving without a constant coating of road spray. Who do we call to explain we are sorry and won't do whatever it is we did wrong to get this much snow?

I just checked again and...no... the "Fat Lady" isn't singing - she's at her real estate agent's office and looking at cheap Florida housing.

Arbitrary Ramblings: David Schmidt-Jim Doepke-Mayor Larry Nelson-Mexico and more

Jay Walt — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 22:41:00 GMT

POLITICAL:

Are the Democratic and Republican presidential candidates collecting money, re-grouping, and catching a spirited 2'nd wind for the home stretch? (Or has everyone, including the press, lost complete interest because they all are starting to sound the same?)

When will someone explain why being "Tough on Crime?" is so vitally important in the Gableman vs Butler Supreme Court election? (And no..."just because" doesn't work for me)

Why has Waukesha Mayor Larry Nelson (a declared Democrat) suddenly become a lightning rod for Republican criticism? (Is it possible the GOP finally added up presidential primary results in Waukesha and realized Democrat votes far outnumbered the Republican faithful?)

COMMUNITY:

Waukesha School Superintendent David Schmidt is retiring. There will be a "send-off" luncheon at the Country Springs Hotel on April 10'th. Co-sponsored by the Waukesha Education Foundation and the Waukesha Chamber of Commerce, there are more groups offering plaudits than time available for speakers. A nice tribute to a man who will be missed. Call the Chamber for details @ 262-542-4249.

Retired Waukesha North Marching Band Director Jim Doepke remains active during retirement. He has announced his desire to play the National Anthem on the trumpet at all Major League Ballparks. Commissioner Bud Selig has endorsed this and we wish Jim the very best!

Kudos to the various Departments of Public Works who kept the streets clear this winter. Let's try to remember the costs connected with this year when their budgets are blown by the end of the third quarter.

We in Waukesha will all feel the loss of Senior Journal Sentinel Editor Bruce Gill who passed away at the young age of 56. He was instrumental in bringing the Waukesha Bureau the resources to showcase the goings-on in our Community. He will be remembered as a class act.

FAMILY:

Upcoming trip to Mexico with four families holds promise of relaxation, sun, warmth, friendship, and many memories for the upcoming year. (Why do "Dirty Monkeys" and "Miami Vice" beverages only taste good in warm climates?)

Spring Fever has gripped our family. How long before the ice is gone from Okauchee Lake??

"Affordable" Housing Costs - Another looming crisis for Waukesha?

Jay Walt — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 01:15:22 GMT

Kelly, my oldest, graduated last Spring and has a stimulating, professional job which challenges her while giving her occasional glimpses into career satisfaction. With rents set extremely high for a single occupant, we jointly agreed that she embark on a mission of saving for a down payment on a home.

We started by balancing her "net" against expenses including monthly mortgage, tax escrow, insurance, utility, car, food, entertainment (not much left for that..) and misc. expenses. I then offered the tax advantages she would receive from interest and taxes paid after she survived her first year. Ultimately, we ran these scenarios and put together a range of what she could afford now for housing.

I am shell-shocked! "Affordable" housing?? We ran on-line searches and basically became numb with the realization that housing is truly not affordable for many single wage-earners. A $150,000 home with 10% down would produce a monthly payment of approximately $1,050.00 for principal, interest, and taxes. That's with a fixed 30 year mortgage at 5.875%. Now add the aforementioned expenses and...

We are glad Kelly's home and saving. And while the current mortgage crisis plays out, we are discussing the opportunity this could present for her later this year if timing works out: Reduced home prices/ historically low interest rates/ and the ability to "make an offer" free of the dreaded "Contingent upon sale of my home" clause that has doomed many a recent deal.

But, particularly with a starter home in the $150,000 range - minimum (and many Communities significantly higher than this), even a very good deal will leave her cash-strapped. Realistically, she might very well have to leave the immediate Waukesha area to find affordable, safe housing in this price sector.

With all of the other challenges facing the Waukesha area, I suggest adding "affordable housing" to the "NOW" list before we wake-up one day in the near future and join many Wisconsin Communities in asking - "Where did all the bright young people go?"

Polarization in Politics

Jay Walt — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 16:36:52 GMT

Are we really to be defined by an overly-simplified classification of "Republican or Democrat?"

Is it fair that we should be pigeon-holed into a broad political party's platform even if we don't agree with its' entirety?

With politics front and center in Wisconsin, particularly in Waukesha, should we judge new acquaintances this simplistically?

The political pundits in the media spew on the daily happenings and offer not-so-brilliant comments, always in retrospect, about what occurred while forecasting (about as well as TV meteorologists...) the next day of campaigns.

Local and national political columnists earn their paychecks writing narrowly-defined articles which almost completely avoid facts with the sole intent of keeping themselves employed. They treat us as "ignorants" with no memory nor ability to delineate fact from fiction! These columnists are intolerant, by design, of anything evenly remotely distracting from their job of delivering the message their employers hired them to deliver. Remember - unlike these blogs, this is their job that pays their mortgages and/or rent. Their "mission" - Be controversial to attract readers which ultimately attracts advertisers... Facts? They are secondary...

I will keep an open mind this election season (and it is going to be a loooong season...). I don't need to tune to talk-radio because they are no longer new and fresh, and 5 minutes of any of their shows is enough to know where they stand and who they support. Once the Democrats make their selection, the columnists will strengthen their footholds on boredom and their own party-speak. Phone-canvassing and mailings will be plentiful. Election year TV ads will resemble Super Bowl ads - I'm awaiting dancing geckos swaying to "Thriller" while background banners tout John McCain. Or the "Republican" Dalmatian jumping onto the "Republican" Campaign tour bus while Clydesdales amble up to polling booths discussing their choices.

Regardless of what happens during the many election months ahead, I will concentrate on avoiding political no-chance-of-winning arguments with friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and even family members. My heart will be warmed by the millions of dollars pumped into the economy in advertising; pulp plants in Northern Wisconsin will adjust their production to meet increased demands for handouts, flyers, and mailers; petroleum companies will raise prices (and profits) as a result of candidates criss-crossing the country via gas-guzzling planes, trains, and automobiles;and ultimately almost half of this Country's voters (maybe more??) will be disappointed and disheartened this coming November.

Heck - why do we need rebates to stimulate the economy? Just have Presidential elections every two years instead of four.

Folks - Keep your sanity. Read the papers the weekend before the election and just vote for whoever the papers say is going to win. Remember: When they win - you win!

Ice Fishing with his Buddies

Jay Walt — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 04:04:00 GMT

My son Jordan spent much of Christmas Break time-off from college on the blustery surfaces of Okauchee Lake, He and his friends were... Ice-Fishin'!

No fancy shelters, firepits, or heaters for these intrepid outdoorsmen. These lads went out with their gear loaded in a couple of old 5 gallon paint buckets. Jigs, shiners, tip-ups, and hand-warmers. They carried Jordie's Grandpa Darrell's "Lucky" ice auger and a snow shovel. Spots were scouted and friendly hello's extended to others in the general area. Ice was cleared and after careful deliberation, holes dug.

And they waited...and talked, and they jigged their lines...and they waited...and "Strike!!" Their tip-up had a line set and they dove for their first-ever ice-fishin' catch - a beautiful Northern Pike. They screamed and jumped and laughed. They could not believe some fish picked their 12" spot on all of Okauchee to hit on a minnow. Other fishermen in the area waved congrats to the couple of college kids who "got lucky". And everything settled back down.

"Strike!" Another hit - another fish! More laughing and backslapping. Only this time the other fishermen didn't appear quite as happy for my son and friend. The kids didn't even notice - cellphones were out and the boys were calling anyone who would answer with news of their incredible success!

After 2-3 more catches that first day, they packed it in and 7 hours after leaving, they headed home for warmth and storytelling. Digital photos were produced and emailed, and suddenly Jordan had several friends including Jeff, Drew, Ryan and more volunteering to keep him company on his next trip.

There were several more "next" trips to Okauchee with quite a few different buddies. Grandpa's "Lucky Auger" never let them down. Every trip a success. Sometimes only Northern; other times perch and bass for good measure. The fish stories were fun to play over and over again, and yes - they looked cold...really cold. The truth is they enjoyed the best memories ever - each other's company. The upside down buckets provided these kids with the best fishin' memories - memories shared with good buddies.

I know Grandpa Darrell is proud that his Lucky Auger got a second wind with Jordie and his friends. Darrell also noted to all that "he was the first to take Jordan ice-fishing" several years ago. Jordan came home and told his mother how he had called Darrell from the ice to let him know how well they were doing. My own joy at seeing these kids enjoy something non-electronic and get "back to basics" was heartfelt.

They are back at school now. The fish were all "catch & release". The auger dried-off and put away. The tip-ups and jigs now stored in those 5 gallon buckets. And, under strictest orders from my son, I can only tell you the holes have frozen back over on "that southern part of the Lake".

Like the ice on Okauchee, my son and his buddies will return.